Music may not save your soul, but it will make your soul worth saving.

If we protected Afghanistan as well as politicians protect their own asses, the world would have nothing to fear

I wonder if Dracula looks at all these "Twilight" people and thinks, "Casual Friday has gone too far"?

Ah, dangerous things: an eleven-year-old boy's best friend!

We must acknowledge once and for all that the purpose of diplomacy is to prolong a crisis.

The next time some smug European starts lecturing you about how America has lost its moral compass, and tortures people, and is turning its Constitution into hamster bedding, you can look them straight in the eye and say “at least we didn’t let ‘The Final Countdown’ go to number one, you tone-deaf bastard.” And do you know what they will say to that? Nothing. Because there is nothing to say. You held the line, America. Stand tall.

A difference that makes no difference is no difference.

I created this for peaceful, cheese-loving purposes, but you have forced me to wield it in anger!