FAN FILM FRIDAY: Bland. James Bland.

Republibot 4.0
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Once, long ago, R3 mentioned that he was the star in a James Bond parody fanfilm that fell apart after filming began. (Excuse me: R3 is calling himself Kevin Long now)

This got me to wondering if there really were any James Bond fan films out there. My research led me to the intriguing case of "Moonraker '78." This is probably the first Bond Fan Film. It was made by teenagers in 1978, and followed the plot of the book more than the film did. It was shot on 8mm film, and had no soundtrack. Still: when word got out about it, United Artist sued the kids and took posession of all copies of the movie. To date, it's a lost fanfilm. I couldn't find it or even any clips of it

There are about a billion Bond Fan Films, however, and they have about the range of quality you'd expect. Curiously, unlike most fanfilms, these productions tend to be long. Often feature length. For instance, "Reflections of the Soul"

or
"A Whisper of Love"

or
"The Diamond Smugglers"

If you've ever wondered what James Bond would be like without a cool car, neat toys, pretty girls, England, an English accent, action, adventure, or plots that grab your attention, these are the fanfilms for you. And if this doesn't quench your thirst for an MI6 that is obviously a cubical farm filmed after hours without the boss knowing, there are honestly dozens more.

Though honestly, despite the I-Don't-Want-To-Watch-But-I-Can't-Turn-Away quality of the last example, it is at least an ambitious film. The makers attempted to take on of Ian Flemming's non-Bond novels, and turn it into one. This is pointless as Flemming himself kind of did that with "Diamonds are Forever," but for a kids' production, that's surprisingly inventive.

the I-Don't-Want-To-Watch-But-I-Can't-Look

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