ORIGINAL FICTION: "Rapture: 1980" by Republibot 3.0

Republibot 3.0
Republibot 3.0's picture

Since one group of people is predicting the Rapture will happen tomorrow, I thought maybe I should share the lyrics to a song I wrote a couple years ago. I mean no disrespect. This is based on an actual true story that actually happened to me.

They were talking about the buffalo chip flip
On an NBC show that was called “Real People”
When he said to his parents, “Did you see that?”
And the silence that met him felt lethal.

Still no reply when he said it again
So he turned and found them both gone
So he ran through their home calling for them
And was frantic before too long

He screamed blue murder out the front door
His panic both sprawling and pure
For they’d disappeared in the twinkling of an eye
And he knew that it was the rapture.

In his thirteen year old way there was only one thought
And that was that he’d been left behind
So he hauled out the church directory and called the preacher
To convince him it was all in his mind

But the phone rang and rang and no one picked up
Which scared him badly, but he knew what to do
He called all the elders and deacons
But it seems like all of them were out, too

So he hauled out his bible and read all the verses
And calculated the days remaining as well
But as bad as things were he knew they’d get worse
In seven years he’d be sent to hell

His folks came back in while he contemplated suicide
He screamed in relief while they rolled their eyes and sighed
“What the hell is your problem, it’s not like we’d died,
We were just across the street talking to Lloyd Tabb.
We were just talking to Lloyd Tabb.”
But he danced in hysterics as the man looked at his bride
The boy overjoyed that he wasn’t yet to be fried
And in a voice that was entirely unlike pride
He said, “Can’t we ever have just one normal night
Just one normal night?”

“My boy, you’re due for a long, miserable life
If every time we quietly leave a room
You freak out and panic and
Franticly portend your own doom”

And of course it was.
And of course it still is.

Copyright 2010, Republibot 3.0
On a personal level, I believe in The Rapture, but given that Jesus Himself said He didn't know when it was going to happen, and given that the Bible clearly and repeatedly says not to try and figure it out, I find it really distasteful when people do this kind of thing. And of course as you can see above, it really traumatized me.